Rob's Bio.
By Chad.

Rob Stiles is the most compact and efficient member of Squad Patrol. Born Robert Loggia Stiles, after his uncle's favorite actor Robert Loggia (Necessary Roughness, Independence Day), Rob has followed in his uncle's favorite's footsteps, taking on Hollywood, one leg at a time.

Rob's sketch comedy greatness started shining through at the tender age of 5 months, when as a baby he performed his first one-man show, entitled "Out of the Womb, Into the Fire". This was the first of many shows that Rob wrote and performed to rave and non-rave reviews. He later received a Tony Award for his show "That Girl Gave Me More Than Cooties".

Rob was on top of the world and thought his life couldn't get any better. Then his family moved to Marysville, Washington, where he met is life partner, Oscar Beltran. Oscar was Rob's other half, or in Rob's word "He was the part of my soul that was missing." Unfortunately Oscar died four days later, and the Oscar Beltran that is in the group now, is but a mere shadow of the real Oscar Beltran.

Rob went on with his life, and joined up with an adventurous archeologist named something Jones. The two had a great adventure in India where Rob dressed up as a small Chinese boy called Short Round. They stopped an evil priest and returned the magic stone to its rightful village and peace was restored. Rob loved adventure, but hated being an Asian boy.

Rob kept up his adventurous lifestyle until he found his true love: college. Rob bounced around several colleges, even Jay Z's school of hard knocks, until he settled on Washington State University. Like any man who has felt the wind on his neck from countless adventures, Rob absorbed everything that WSU had to offer, and can now regurgitate it like a robin feeding her young.

There is only one thing he likes better then performing on Squad Patrol and that is watching human sized parrots fly helicopters. The future looks bright for Rob, so bright he has to wear shades, you know the ones. The kind that are like fluorescent plastic blinds. Yeah those are the ones, and those are what Rob will be wearing.